feeling kinda blue.

been staring at the calendar more than ever these past few weeks. find myself constantly counting down to emancipation. every week that passes, everyday night before i sleep, every morning that i awake to, i'm reminding myself of the days i have left. it's almost become a ritual. kinda like counting down to the end of 'A's. it motivates me, spurs me on through my remaining days of ns. less than a month to go, at least its close enough to count down. unlike some idiot i saw on msn whose nick was: 565 days to ord. that can't be healthy.

was clearing my email the other day when i came across one sent by rob some years back. turned out it was a link to her ancient blog which i'm surprised still existed. though the last entry was eons ago. i found myself reading one entry after another until i covered every single entry there was, which was pretty much late JC1, the entire JC2, and even a few months of the post 'A's period. and it was after all that reading that it dawned on me, wow, we actually shared quite a history together. one particular entry made me feel so touched. so many things that i no longer recall were there written in this forgotten page. and i believe this is exactly why people actually keep journals. i bet even rob has forgotten bout the site. some of the entries brought back so much memories and invoked this sense of wanting to relive those days, though i know full well it ain't possible. but still, it was nice reading through all that. JC, NS...everything's going by so quickly. they always say we gotta take a step back, slow down and savour the sweet moments in life. how true.

what was more fulfilling than reading through rob's entries was reading the numerous emails that shin and i use to exchange. brought a big grin to my face. it's been ages since we last sent each other emails. it's one of those nice things that fade with time. and it's all cos we allowed it to. it's time i put in more effort.